[identity profile] ncruuk.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] femslash_fluff
TITLE: Be prepared....

AUTHOR: ncruuk

FANDOM & PAIRING: SVU: Alex/Olivia

DISCLAIMERS: Not mine, no money, just some fluffy fun.....

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I make no excuses.....(do I ever?) I've had a long, hot, frustratingly boring week. I don't even know if this is funny, but I decided to write it anyway because I find it amusing.

The challenge is after the fluff so as to preserve some small hope of this fluff being amusing.....






"She didn't..." began Elliot, not sure how to react to his partner's latest bombshell, but mindful that he was not only well within hitting distance, but also lacking in easy escape routes.

"You want to see it to believe it?" asked Olivia, looking questioningly at her partner.

"No...I believe you..." said Elliot, although his tone clearly suggested otherwise.

"What's so hard to believe El?" asked Olivia, taking another bite of her pretzel, her eyes never leaving from the door they were watching, waiting for their perp to appear.

"I didn't realise people even did that anymore..."

"Sure they do..." Olivia's tone was so full of conviction, Elliot recognised he was going to have to compromise to survive this conversation, irrespective of what he actually thought.

"Ok...but only if they're ninety..." He couldn't help himself, and should have known better, really, he should.

"ELLIOT!" Olivia did not take kindly to having Elliot liken her girlfriend to a ninety-year-old.

"Sorry...but you have to admit it's a strange thing for Alex to do..." amended Elliot, accepting now that she could do it, but wondering how the hell she'd learnt how to, or why....

"Their housekeeper taught her when she was a kid..." explained Olivia briefly, unwilling to expand on it. Elliot didn't need to know the full complexity of Alex's privileged upbringing by incredibly hands-off parents that had actually meant she was brought up by the 'help'. She'd never mastered cooking, but it had eventually been decided that that was genetic. Everything else, she excelled at, just as Olivia would have expected.

"Ok, so she had the knowledge..." began Elliot, approaching this conundrum as if he would a case, "...and you provided the opportunity, but how the hell did she have the means?"

"She had her purse El..." explained Olivia, finishing her pretzel, beginning to wonder how they'd got onto this topic in the first place.

"And that makes sense how?"

"When you're out and need something like a pain pill or a pen, what do you do?" asked Olivia practically, risking a glance at her partner.

"And I haven't got it?" clarified Elliot, thinking.

"Yeah..."

"I ask you or Kathy..."

"Why?"

"Because you always have it...."

"Where do we have it?" asked Olivia wearily, wondering if it was just her perspective, or whether Elliot was genuinely making very heavy weather of this rather simple non-issue.

"Your purses....." answered Elliot deflated, only to suddenly straighten in his seat so rapidly it made Olivia nearly give herself whiplash as she turned to look out of the windshield at the door they were watching, only to be disappointed as Elliot exclaimed,

"A needle and thread? You expect me to believe that Alex carries a needle and thread in her purse?"

"Of course..." exclaimed Olivia in now bored frustration, "...what else did you expect her to use to darn my gym sock with when we were in the locker room just now?"


CHALLENGE: Alex/Olivia, gym locker room, socks
CHALLENGER: the_girl_20

Have I finally lost the fluffy plot?

Date: 2006-07-07 10:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darandkerry.livejournal.com
No, you did not lose the fluffy plot. You did, however, have me on three different occasions tempted to quickly scroll to the bottom to read the ending. I could not imagine where this was going. The ninety year old analogy really had me stumped. Very enjoyable indeed.

Date: 2006-07-07 11:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] malloryl.livejournal.com
quite enjoyable on a friday afternoon

Date: 2006-07-08 04:20 am (UTC)
ext_6175: (made me grin)
From: [identity profile] elfcat255.livejournal.com
I loved it..you had me wondering what they were talking about too and when I got to the end ..oh man..I scared a cat I laughed so loudly..heh..good one...I like trying to figure stuff out.

Date: 2006-07-10 10:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greenovalfruit.livejournal.com
LOL... nyahaha!

Date: 2006-07-10 04:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oliviamadness.livejournal.com
Okay you seriously had me stumped. I had quite a few ideas throughout the fluff but I Alex darning a sock wasnt one of them. Good job.

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